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Ever wondered what goes on in her mind?
My name is Alethea.
I am 14 years old
I have this delusional thing that my name is the best name in the world, but that's just my subconciousness trying to grasp some part of myself that is not self loathing.
I have almost non existent self esteem. Even though I play 3 instruments (well, lets just leave it at 3) and I am supposedly I am a gymnast (I think I am too fail to be under that title), I'm under the impression I am bad at everything. (Which I am!)
I have a very obsessive nature. I am also quite unpredictable and unreliable and I'm scared of being social.
On of my special talents is yodelling.
That's how weird I am of course.
I like talking using words with more that 3 syllables to make it sound as if I am speaking a language other than English, even though that's the only language I speak. I'm a disgrace to Asians apparently because I cannot speak the language in which my complexion screams out otherwise.
I am obsessed with big words and psychological disorders and paradoxes of all kinds.
I have survived through a 7.1 magnitude earthquake and numerous aftershocks, and been to 7 different schools in my life. (And 5 gym clubs and I don't even want to start counting the teachers.)
I fear I am a pessimist.
Sometimes I am a grammar freak too.
This blog is to help other understand what goes on in my head.
Good luck with that!
★ profile★
ramblings of a teenage girl
My name is Alethea.
I am 14 years old
I have this delusional thing that my name is the best name in the world, but that's just my subconciousness trying to grasp some part of myself that is not self loathing.
I have almost non existent self esteem. Even though I play 3 instruments (well, lets just leave it at 3) and I am supposedly I am a gymnast (I think I am too fail to be under that title), I'm under the impression I am bad at everything. (Which I am!)
I have a very obsessive nature. I am also quite unpredictable and unreliable and I'm scared of being social.
On of my special talents is yodelling.
That's how weird I am of course.
I like talking using words with more that 3 syllables to make it sound as if I am speaking a language other than English, even though that's the only language I speak. I'm a disgrace to Asians apparently because I cannot speak the language in which my complexion screams out otherwise.
I am obsessed with big words and psychological disorders and paradoxes of all kinds.
I have survived through a 7.1 magnitude earthquake and numerous aftershocks, and been to 7 different schools in my life. (And 5 gym clubs and I don't even want to start counting the teachers.)
I fear I am a pessimist.
Sometimes I am a grammar freak too.
This blog is to help other understand what goes on in my head.
Good luck with that!
"You're crazy!"
"I know!"
For a completely unproductive night of resting, I have to say that I feel strangely energised. I had about 3 pockets of sleep, 1 hour at a time (that make 3 hours in total). In the middle one, I dreamt something I can't remember, but it was one of those dreams that leave you with a funny feeling you know? These external feelings are scaring me.
It was also incredibly cold last night. So much that any movement you make involving your body touching a new part of the duvet was uncomfortable because it's freezing cold. So, after pocket number one of sleep, (it was 2.35am) there was a lot of frantic moving/shuffling and trying to keep warm. In the end, I settled into lying on my back, the supposedly conventional way for sleeping. Next thing you know, all my pillows were on the floor and so was the duvet and it was 3.50am.
I wonder how much I sleep talked during that time. Oh yes, I do sleep talk. I reckon it's because I have too much to say that I haven't said during the day. And I think it heightens when I'm stressed. I don't think I'm stressed now, but who knows?
At Nationals last year, apparently I sat up and full out yelled at some random in my dream (at the motel...awkward). My mum thought I was possessed. I didn't remember anything.
Apparently I've sung some stuff in my sleep too. This is why I can never get a partner hahaha.
Anyway, at 4.00am in the morning, it was COLD COLD COLD and some of my sisters were shuffling around too (I share a room with my 3 sisters, yes one room with 4 of us). This last pocket of 'sleep' was really just me going in and out of consciousness and thinking about random stuff. My stupid phone alarm went off at 6.00am and that was when I felt ready to go to bed. How unfortunate.
And today, I still don't feel right. Everything is still surreal.
Maybe it's the cold?
But it's probably just me.
...
"I know!"
★ No Sleep, as expected. ★
Thursday, August 18, 2011 ( 12:35 PM )
For a completely unproductive night of resting, I have to say that I feel strangely energised. I had about 3 pockets of sleep, 1 hour at a time (that make 3 hours in total). In the middle one, I dreamt something I can't remember, but it was one of those dreams that leave you with a funny feeling you know? These external feelings are scaring me.
It was also incredibly cold last night. So much that any movement you make involving your body touching a new part of the duvet was uncomfortable because it's freezing cold. So, after pocket number one of sleep, (it was 2.35am) there was a lot of frantic moving/shuffling and trying to keep warm. In the end, I settled into lying on my back, the supposedly conventional way for sleeping. Next thing you know, all my pillows were on the floor and so was the duvet and it was 3.50am.
I wonder how much I sleep talked during that time. Oh yes, I do sleep talk. I reckon it's because I have too much to say that I haven't said during the day. And I think it heightens when I'm stressed. I don't think I'm stressed now, but who knows?
At Nationals last year, apparently I sat up and full out yelled at some random in my dream (at the motel...awkward). My mum thought I was possessed. I didn't remember anything.
Apparently I've sung some stuff in my sleep too. This is why I can never get a partner hahaha.
Anyway, at 4.00am in the morning, it was COLD COLD COLD and some of my sisters were shuffling around too (I share a room with my 3 sisters, yes one room with 4 of us). This last pocket of 'sleep' was really just me going in and out of consciousness and thinking about random stuff. My stupid phone alarm went off at 6.00am and that was when I felt ready to go to bed. How unfortunate.
And today, I still don't feel right. Everything is still surreal.
Maybe it's the cold?
But it's probably just me.
...
We all have times where we say stuff we didn't really mean
I just have more of these times than the average person!
I just have more of these times than the average person!
★ tagboard ★
i think they call it freedom of speech
If I dwelled on the fact weirdness was a bad thing
I'd probably be dead by now.
Eeiyn Natasha's Fantabulous Blog
My Miniscule Book Blog
Nicole's Spectacular Blog
Maxine's Magnificent Blog
Sapphire's Snaffalicious Blog
Sarah's So Awesome Blog
December 2010
April 2011
May 2011
June 2011
July 2011
August 2011
September 2011
October 2011
November 2011
December 2011
January 2012
March 2012
designer DancingSheep
I'd probably be dead by now.
★ links ★
ctrl + left click
Eeiyn Natasha's Fantabulous Blog
My Miniscule Book Blog
Nicole's Spectacular Blog
Maxine's Magnificent Blog
Sapphire's Snaffalicious Blog
Sarah's So Awesome Blog
★ archives ★
watch me waste my life away
December 2010
April 2011
May 2011
June 2011
July 2011
August 2011
September 2011
October 2011
November 2011
December 2011
January 2012
March 2012
★ credits ★
designer DancingSheep
My life's goal
Is to be spontaneous because that's the way I roll
★ SAPPHIRE! ★
★ KENDALL! ★
★ MAXINE! ★
★ DANIELLE! ★
★ CHARLOTTE! ★
★ CAITLIN! ★
★ LAUREN! ★
★ ERIN! ★
★ EEIYN! ★
★ NICOLE! ★
Is to be spontaneous because that's the way I roll
★ SHOUTOUTS ★
even if I don't say ♥ that often
★ SAPPHIRE! ★
★ KENDALL! ★
★ MAXINE! ★
★ DANIELLE! ★
★ CHARLOTTE! ★
★ CAITLIN! ★
★ LAUREN! ★
★ ERIN! ★
★ EEIYN! ★
★ NICOLE! ★