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Ever wondered what goes on in her mind?
My name is Alethea.
I am 14 years old
I have this delusional thing that my name is the best name in the world, but that's just my subconciousness trying to grasp some part of myself that is not self loathing.
I have almost non existent self esteem. Even though I play 3 instruments (well, lets just leave it at 3) and I am supposedly I am a gymnast (I think I am too fail to be under that title), I'm under the impression I am bad at everything. (Which I am!)
I have a very obsessive nature. I am also quite unpredictable and unreliable and I'm scared of being social.
On of my special talents is yodelling.
That's how weird I am of course.
I like talking using words with more that 3 syllables to make it sound as if I am speaking a language other than English, even though that's the only language I speak. I'm a disgrace to Asians apparently because I cannot speak the language in which my complexion screams out otherwise.
I am obsessed with big words and psychological disorders and paradoxes of all kinds.
I have survived through a 7.1 magnitude earthquake and numerous aftershocks, and been to 7 different schools in my life. (And 5 gym clubs and I don't even want to start counting the teachers.)
I fear I am a pessimist.
Sometimes I am a grammar freak too.
This blog is to help other understand what goes on in my head.
Good luck with that!
★ profile★
ramblings of a teenage girl
My name is Alethea.
I am 14 years old
I have this delusional thing that my name is the best name in the world, but that's just my subconciousness trying to grasp some part of myself that is not self loathing.
I have almost non existent self esteem. Even though I play 3 instruments (well, lets just leave it at 3) and I am supposedly I am a gymnast (I think I am too fail to be under that title), I'm under the impression I am bad at everything. (Which I am!)
I have a very obsessive nature. I am also quite unpredictable and unreliable and I'm scared of being social.
On of my special talents is yodelling.
That's how weird I am of course.
I like talking using words with more that 3 syllables to make it sound as if I am speaking a language other than English, even though that's the only language I speak. I'm a disgrace to Asians apparently because I cannot speak the language in which my complexion screams out otherwise.
I am obsessed with big words and psychological disorders and paradoxes of all kinds.
I have survived through a 7.1 magnitude earthquake and numerous aftershocks, and been to 7 different schools in my life. (And 5 gym clubs and I don't even want to start counting the teachers.)
I fear I am a pessimist.
Sometimes I am a grammar freak too.
This blog is to help other understand what goes on in my head.
Good luck with that!
"You're crazy!"
"I know!"
Contrary to my post about people seeing into my mind, I now think it may now be a bad or useless idea. First of all, no one is going to be able to decifer what the heck is going on in there. And second, if you can't see directly out of my eyes, then you'll still know nothing.
Fail.
Anyway, I think I'm going to be a dwarf for the rest of my life. It's all my parents fault, none of them are above 170cm. But then again, some of my siblings are pretty tall, I mean, they're all taller than I was when I was their age (with the exception of Helaina, but she has stick legs and probably something wrong wth her metabolism). It's so depressing. I'm destined to be forever to be in the lower quartile of people in heights. Argh.
I suppose there may be benefits to being short. When I was 12 I got passed off as a 9 year old so I could go on the luge in Queenstown for a discounted price. Go me. I wonder how innocent I really looked...that was only 2 years ago! I don't think I was any more/less controlled or rebellious than I was 2 years ago. Maybe it was just hidden better. Who knows?
One of my aunties is 30...she got passed off as a 15 year old. But she's really dwarfish. (Even I'm taller than her!)
Today, I want to complain about parties. You know, social functions actually scare the hell out of me. You have to dress up, buy stuff, make yourself a reputation...yea I hate it. I'd rather be alone. Unless I'm on a high of course, I'm either on a high, or maybe sick and depressed. Actually I'm sick all the time, mentally, but back to the topic...parties are so useless! In primary school I stopped getting invites because I always declined. This was because my ultra controlling parents didn't allow me to go since it was a 'waste of time' and apparently I had 'better things to do' (cough gym cough) so I never went. (Well, I went to maybe one or two, but those were exceptions.) I kinda convinced myself that hated them anyway so I wouldn't feel bad when all my other mates went and I didn't. Same thing with camp. At first I wanted to go. And I kicked up a fuss. But now, I so freaked out about spending 3 days away with people I don't even know. I don't mind the 'going away' part, but the people part is horrible. I'd rather be alone. I'm going to die. I'm going to die. I'm going to die.
This is why I wish to embark on a life of solitary confinement. Deep in the wilderness. (Don't ask me to get animals and be a crazy cat lady or something along the lines, I don't particularly like animals. Putting that out there.)
People say I'm weird, they say I'm dysfunctional, they say I'm stuffed up inside, away from people will be awesome.
I need to find some deep wlderness to go hide in.
"I know!"
★ Short & Not Partying ★
Saturday, September 17, 2011 ( 9:31 AM )
Contrary to my post about people seeing into my mind, I now think it may now be a bad or useless idea. First of all, no one is going to be able to decifer what the heck is going on in there. And second, if you can't see directly out of my eyes, then you'll still know nothing.
Fail.
Anyway, I think I'm going to be a dwarf for the rest of my life. It's all my parents fault, none of them are above 170cm. But then again, some of my siblings are pretty tall, I mean, they're all taller than I was when I was their age (with the exception of Helaina, but she has stick legs and probably something wrong wth her metabolism). It's so depressing. I'm destined to be forever to be in the lower quartile of people in heights. Argh.
I suppose there may be benefits to being short. When I was 12 I got passed off as a 9 year old so I could go on the luge in Queenstown for a discounted price. Go me. I wonder how innocent I really looked...that was only 2 years ago! I don't think I was any more/less controlled or rebellious than I was 2 years ago. Maybe it was just hidden better. Who knows?
One of my aunties is 30...she got passed off as a 15 year old. But she's really dwarfish. (Even I'm taller than her!)
Today, I want to complain about parties. You know, social functions actually scare the hell out of me. You have to dress up, buy stuff, make yourself a reputation...yea I hate it. I'd rather be alone. Unless I'm on a high of course, I'm either on a high, or maybe sick and depressed. Actually I'm sick all the time, mentally, but back to the topic...parties are so useless! In primary school I stopped getting invites because I always declined. This was because my ultra controlling parents didn't allow me to go since it was a 'waste of time' and apparently I had 'better things to do' (cough gym cough) so I never went. (Well, I went to maybe one or two, but those were exceptions.) I kinda convinced myself that hated them anyway so I wouldn't feel bad when all my other mates went and I didn't. Same thing with camp. At first I wanted to go. And I kicked up a fuss. But now, I so freaked out about spending 3 days away with people I don't even know. I don't mind the 'going away' part, but the people part is horrible. I'd rather be alone. I'm going to die. I'm going to die. I'm going to die.
This is why I wish to embark on a life of solitary confinement. Deep in the wilderness. (Don't ask me to get animals and be a crazy cat lady or something along the lines, I don't particularly like animals. Putting that out there.)
People say I'm weird, they say I'm dysfunctional, they say I'm stuffed up inside, away from people will be awesome.
I need to find some deep wlderness to go hide in.
We all have times where we say stuff we didn't really mean
I just have more of these times than the average person!
I just have more of these times than the average person!
★ tagboard ★
i think they call it freedom of speech
If I dwelled on the fact weirdness was a bad thing
I'd probably be dead by now.
Eeiyn Natasha's Fantabulous Blog
My Miniscule Book Blog
Nicole's Spectacular Blog
Maxine's Magnificent Blog
Sapphire's Snaffalicious Blog
Sarah's So Awesome Blog
December 2010
April 2011
May 2011
June 2011
July 2011
August 2011
September 2011
October 2011
November 2011
December 2011
January 2012
March 2012
designer DancingSheep
I'd probably be dead by now.
★ links ★
ctrl + left click
Eeiyn Natasha's Fantabulous Blog
My Miniscule Book Blog
Nicole's Spectacular Blog
Maxine's Magnificent Blog
Sapphire's Snaffalicious Blog
Sarah's So Awesome Blog
★ archives ★
watch me waste my life away
December 2010
April 2011
May 2011
June 2011
July 2011
August 2011
September 2011
October 2011
November 2011
December 2011
January 2012
March 2012
★ credits ★
designer DancingSheep
My life's goal
Is to be spontaneous because that's the way I roll
★ SAPPHIRE! ★
★ KENDALL! ★
★ MAXINE! ★
★ DANIELLE! ★
★ CHARLOTTE! ★
★ CAITLIN! ★
★ LAUREN! ★
★ ERIN! ★
★ EEIYN! ★
★ NICOLE! ★
Is to be spontaneous because that's the way I roll
★ SHOUTOUTS ★
even if I don't say ♥ that often
★ SAPPHIRE! ★
★ KENDALL! ★
★ MAXINE! ★
★ DANIELLE! ★
★ CHARLOTTE! ★
★ CAITLIN! ★
★ LAUREN! ★
★ ERIN! ★
★ EEIYN! ★
★ NICOLE! ★