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Ever wondered what goes on in her mind?
My name is Alethea.
I am 14 years old
I have this delusional thing that my name is the best name in the world, but that's just my subconciousness trying to grasp some part of myself that is not self loathing.
I have almost non existent self esteem. Even though I play 3 instruments (well, lets just leave it at 3) and I am supposedly I am a gymnast (I think I am too fail to be under that title), I'm under the impression I am bad at everything. (Which I am!)
I have a very obsessive nature. I am also quite unpredictable and unreliable and I'm scared of being social.
On of my special talents is yodelling.
That's how weird I am of course.
I like talking using words with more that 3 syllables to make it sound as if I am speaking a language other than English, even though that's the only language I speak. I'm a disgrace to Asians apparently because I cannot speak the language in which my complexion screams out otherwise.
I am obsessed with big words and psychological disorders and paradoxes of all kinds.
I have survived through a 7.1 magnitude earthquake and numerous aftershocks, and been to 7 different schools in my life. (And 5 gym clubs and I don't even want to start counting the teachers.)
I fear I am a pessimist.
Sometimes I am a grammar freak too.
This blog is to help other understand what goes on in my head.
Good luck with that!
★ profile★
ramblings of a teenage girl
My name is Alethea.
I am 14 years old
I have this delusional thing that my name is the best name in the world, but that's just my subconciousness trying to grasp some part of myself that is not self loathing.
I have almost non existent self esteem. Even though I play 3 instruments (well, lets just leave it at 3) and I am supposedly I am a gymnast (I think I am too fail to be under that title), I'm under the impression I am bad at everything. (Which I am!)
I have a very obsessive nature. I am also quite unpredictable and unreliable and I'm scared of being social.
On of my special talents is yodelling.
That's how weird I am of course.
I like talking using words with more that 3 syllables to make it sound as if I am speaking a language other than English, even though that's the only language I speak. I'm a disgrace to Asians apparently because I cannot speak the language in which my complexion screams out otherwise.
I am obsessed with big words and psychological disorders and paradoxes of all kinds.
I have survived through a 7.1 magnitude earthquake and numerous aftershocks, and been to 7 different schools in my life. (And 5 gym clubs and I don't even want to start counting the teachers.)
I fear I am a pessimist.
Sometimes I am a grammar freak too.
This blog is to help other understand what goes on in my head.
Good luck with that!
"You're crazy!"
"I know!"
I wonder if there is ever a point when we human beings stop asking why. Why? Out of all the question starters they teacher us in primary, this is by far the most vague. All it seems to do is provoke more questions. I think as soon as we begin to ask questions, we just become accustomed to 'why' because it applies to everything.
The question I need to ask now is, why? Why is it that no matter what I do, the mark stays on 55? Do the scales ever lie?
I eat nothing, I eat a couple of horses worth of food, I train, I don't train, I do the unadvisable, I stay on the side of sanity (if that is even possible). It really doesn't matter, because my weight is rock solid 55kg.
121 POUNDS!
Why does it never change?!?!?!?!
WHY DOESN'T IT GO DOWN?!!?!?
Maybe I should just give up. Years of intensive googling have not proven successful.
I wonder,
Why do colours provoke thought and emotion?
Why must we possess the ability to sacrifice?
Why do people become disillusioned by their own images?
Why am I worth the priviledge of existence?
Why are we granted the priviledge/curse of living when death is so simple?
Why is life and the like so complex?
Why do people lecture me so often?
Shall I proceed to answer the above?
I'll do the ones I feel are the most important.
Or maybe the ones I know how to answer.
Why do people lecture me so often?
It is because I am so dumb and retarded and fat and horrible and 'disruptive' and insolent and disobedient and arrogant and loud and unacceptably inconsiderate that I get lectured and tongue lashed and chin wagged left, right and centre. If there is something I am doing wrong, right, good or bad, there will no doubt be someone there to express their opinion on the matter and give me their advice...well I have some words for you.
I don't need your freaking advice! I am sick and tired of your face. You hear that? If you are not willing to listen to my own, then why should I listen to yours? Stop telling me I'm good, stop telling me I'm bad, don't talk to me at all. Ignore me. I am so used to being ignored. That's why I turned out to be so utterly demented.
Indirectely- (Gah, don't be a suck up all the time okay?)
I give up. that's all I can answer. What the hell, why is everything half done around me?
So retarded.
"I know!"
★ Why? ★
Wednesday, September 28, 2011 ( 12:21 PM )
I wonder if there is ever a point when we human beings stop asking why. Why? Out of all the question starters they teacher us in primary, this is by far the most vague. All it seems to do is provoke more questions. I think as soon as we begin to ask questions, we just become accustomed to 'why' because it applies to everything.
The question I need to ask now is, why? Why is it that no matter what I do, the mark stays on 55? Do the scales ever lie?
I eat nothing, I eat a couple of horses worth of food, I train, I don't train, I do the unadvisable, I stay on the side of sanity (if that is even possible). It really doesn't matter, because my weight is rock solid 55kg.
121 POUNDS!
Why does it never change?!?!?!?!
WHY DOESN'T IT GO DOWN?!!?!?
Maybe I should just give up. Years of intensive googling have not proven successful.
I wonder,
Why do colours provoke thought and emotion?
Why must we possess the ability to sacrifice?
Why do people become disillusioned by their own images?
Why am I worth the priviledge of existence?
Why are we granted the priviledge/curse of living when death is so simple?
Why is life and the like so complex?
Why do people lecture me so often?
Shall I proceed to answer the above?
I'll do the ones I feel are the most important.
Or maybe the ones I know how to answer.
Why do people lecture me so often?
It is because I am so dumb and retarded and fat and horrible and 'disruptive' and insolent and disobedient and arrogant and loud and unacceptably inconsiderate that I get lectured and tongue lashed and chin wagged left, right and centre. If there is something I am doing wrong, right, good or bad, there will no doubt be someone there to express their opinion on the matter and give me their advice...well I have some words for you.
I don't need your freaking advice! I am sick and tired of your face. You hear that? If you are not willing to listen to my own, then why should I listen to yours? Stop telling me I'm good, stop telling me I'm bad, don't talk to me at all. Ignore me. I am so used to being ignored. That's why I turned out to be so utterly demented.
Indirectely- (Gah, don't be a suck up all the time okay?)
I give up. that's all I can answer. What the hell, why is everything half done around me?
So retarded.
We all have times where we say stuff we didn't really mean
I just have more of these times than the average person!
I just have more of these times than the average person!
★ tagboard ★
i think they call it freedom of speech
If I dwelled on the fact weirdness was a bad thing
I'd probably be dead by now.
Eeiyn Natasha's Fantabulous Blog
My Miniscule Book Blog
Nicole's Spectacular Blog
Maxine's Magnificent Blog
Sapphire's Snaffalicious Blog
Sarah's So Awesome Blog
December 2010
April 2011
May 2011
June 2011
July 2011
August 2011
September 2011
October 2011
November 2011
December 2011
January 2012
March 2012
designer DancingSheep
I'd probably be dead by now.
★ links ★
ctrl + left click
Eeiyn Natasha's Fantabulous Blog
My Miniscule Book Blog
Nicole's Spectacular Blog
Maxine's Magnificent Blog
Sapphire's Snaffalicious Blog
Sarah's So Awesome Blog
★ archives ★
watch me waste my life away
December 2010
April 2011
May 2011
June 2011
July 2011
August 2011
September 2011
October 2011
November 2011
December 2011
January 2012
March 2012
★ credits ★
designer DancingSheep
My life's goal
Is to be spontaneous because that's the way I roll
★ SAPPHIRE! ★
★ KENDALL! ★
★ MAXINE! ★
★ DANIELLE! ★
★ CHARLOTTE! ★
★ CAITLIN! ★
★ LAUREN! ★
★ ERIN! ★
★ EEIYN! ★
★ NICOLE! ★
Is to be spontaneous because that's the way I roll
★ SHOUTOUTS ★
even if I don't say ♥ that often
★ SAPPHIRE! ★
★ KENDALL! ★
★ MAXINE! ★
★ DANIELLE! ★
★ CHARLOTTE! ★
★ CAITLIN! ★
★ LAUREN! ★
★ ERIN! ★
★ EEIYN! ★
★ NICOLE! ★